When we went to Florida to move Grandmom back to Jersey a few weeks back, we brought back a few things from the house that we thought would be useful. Mostly tools from Granddad’s shop, some bungie cords, stuff like that. We also brought back this awesome catalog we found in the liquor cabinet. It was from a liquor store in Cherry Hill, NJ that isn’t even there anymore. Inside the catalog was a separate booklet written by Southern Comfort detailing drink recipes for those groovy happy hours that were so popular back in 1974. Not only does it provide drink recipes for 45 different cocktails, but it explains Astrology and offers tips on how to weave it into conversation during a party. I guess “hey baby, what’s your sign” was too low brow even back then:
This guide summarizes the most widely accepted aspects of each sign – with associated birth gems, lucky days, colors, etc. Keep it handy, to spark Happy Hour conversation.
Without any further delay, I present Happy Hour Mixology – 45 Drink Recipes – Plus a Primer of Happy Hour Astrology
Wow. I’m intrigued already. Check out this dude’s hair! And the strangely hypnotic and Stepford Wivey smile-that’s-not-really-a-smile-because-I’m-doing-this-crappy-photo-shoot smile. What was Southern Comfort putting in those bottles in the early 70’s?
Whoa! Come on, man. Really? A pink leisure suit? No wonder neither of these women is looking your way. They’re way more interested in the guy on the floor with the vest and floral print shirt. And what’s with all the colors and geometric patterns? I’m getting vertigo looking at the woman’s sweater on the right, the wallpaper behind her and the lines on the couch. And did no one know how to sit on furniture properly? One guy’s on the floor, two people are on the arms of couches and the woman with the crazy sweater is sitting backwards, not facing the other people.
“Hey there, Sagitarrius. One more sip of this Manhattan and you’ll be drifting further off into a world of red and pink ecstasy. Trust me, baby. Trust me.”
She totally looks like she’s trying to smile despite the fact this guy smells horrible or maybe just farted.
Is that a robe with buttons? And that plaid jacket totally has elbow pads. Why is everything red? They couldn’t use it in M&M’s so people started wearing it. I’m digging the half vase on the wall overflowing with plastic evergreens.
Did kindergarteners design clothes in 1974? Well, at least we’re seeing some blue now, but there is still plenty of red. I’m really conflicted by this photo. Either the patchwork plaid pants or the electric blue suit are the worst thing I have ever seen in my life. The only thing missing is a fondue pot. Put some moustaches on these guys and it would look like a scene from Anchorman.
More red! And plaid! The guy on the right is getting his groove on. The turtleneck with the suit is so groovy. Not to mention the pose he’s working. The hand in the pocket with the jacket pulled back. The glasses add a distinguished final touch. But what’s with all these guys and their fruity drinks? It’s bad enough they wore such horrible clothes, couldn’t they add some testosterone to the room by downing some Budweiser?